Adult Dating Stories, and Advice

So what do you do when you find yourself getting jealous in a new relationship? Perhaps there are different ways to deal with jealousy depending upon how long you’ve been dating, perhaps there are different types of jealousy depending upon the relationship and what lifestyle and work situation different people are dealing with?

When I feel the feelings of jealousy I try to look at myself and my own insecurities first. If it’s a worry about money or material things I realize that I am worried about my ability to provide a good lifestyle for my mate and jealousy can arise from my own insecurities. There are several ways to fix that one, and they all have to deal with my self.

I then wonder if the girl I am in love with will be looking for bigger and better opportunities, it seems to be a popular thing in today’s over connected high speed world where women can make many contacts with little effort. Then I wonder if I am projecting my own past issues into the current situation. Certainly just because I have been with some shady women in the past who were liars and cheats only using me as a stepping stone to get further and onto other more fruitful financial relationships, I should give this one an honest chance without that baggage. Or maybe I should be looking more critical and do have many reasons to be concerned about women in general having the opportunities surrounding them to move up in the financial ladder of relationships. There are other blog posts and articles talking about how this is more true today than ever (See Steve’s answer to the question).

If I spend every waking hour working and trying to get more and more money, perhaps I will never reach a level where I am not worried about a lover looking to others who may be more well off. Perhaps spending years earning lots of money will leave me in a position where I will worry than a lover may be looking to others who spend more time working out and getting a strong body.

Perhaps I will always worry about not being good enough, or perhaps I will always worry about women using, lieing and cheating no matter how much time I put into making money, or maintaining looks and character. Am I doomed to be a product of my past failed relationships? Will I ever be able to trust completely. Will these issues be fixed within myself? Will I ever find someone who will be there for me no matter what?

Why can’t everyone be honest, and why does this issue have to constantly mess with me? I will write more on this later.

So we’ve been dating for a few months, a couple of months exclusive, now I have to wonder are things fading away, or is this just a time time since she’s suffered a recent family loss and a funeral. I feel like things between us are not the same, and now I wonder if there is something I have done that has made her mad, I wonder if I’m just being selfish?

She’s experienced the loss of someone real close to her, and had to suffer with hospital emergency rooms, surgery doctors, funeral planning, the wake and the burial. I’ve been available to her and tried to support her in any way I can. Perhaps there just hasn’t been enough time for her to get over the issues troubling her, and everything is okay with us. Perhaps I am being selfish, but there has been a few times when I have wondered if our dating was coming to an end.

When I have the feeling of lack of love and affection with her, perhaps I am just reading things wrong. I know that I deal with death and funerals different than most, and she is having a hard time with this recent change in her life. Perhaps if I just stick it out everything will work out fine and she will realize that I am here for her.

I certainly haven’t tried to initiate sex and passionate making out, it’s been only a week. But I can’t help to wonder if there is something more going on, I hadn’t even gotten a kiss or holding hands when we got to hang out and go places together. Maybe I am paranoid, or selfish, just not understanding how hard things are for her. Maybe things are fine. I wonder how long it will be before I know where are dating situation stands.

So I’m in falling for a girl that has kids from a previous relationship, and for the first time I find myself in a dating situation that I have no idea the proper way to handle. What is the proper etiquette for dating a girl with kids? The only thing I have to go by is a few lines in Jerry McGuire and an episode of weeds.

Anyways, the situation that threw for a loop…

So we have the first date where the kids will be joining us for dinner. I’m totally cool with this, I really like her a lot. I want to get her something, and by the time I get to find something for her, the flower shops are closed, so I stop by walgreens thinking I can get something there. Chocolate. She likes chocolate, and damn it is hard to find chocolate and coconut. Anyways, while looking through all the chocolate options I see a christmas pack with 6 pez candy dispensers and it makes me think, should I get something for the kids too?

Would that be weird? Inappropriate?  Would this make it look like I am trying to buy the affection of the kids? Would it be wrong not to get something for the kids?

I was stumped. I stood there an wondered. I actually had people at the store asking me if I needed help finding anything, but I couldn’t ask them what would be right.

I decided to go with a nice box of chocolate in a pretty package, but now I wonder in the future should I consider getting something for the kids?

Dating a milf is much more complicated that I imagined. Now I am wondering about all kinds of other things that could be coming up in this relationship. Are there any experts advising on this issue?